thedispatch | (no subject)

Honestly, I can't even begin to understand my own actions or emotions. I have no business judging you for yours.

[ A very honest explanation, one that manages to pull something out of him, as his gaze drifts away from her as he speaks. ]

[ At that, Grell's features soften. ]

It seems to me that you've barely acquainted with them, is all. From what I've seen, they seem all too familiar.

[ Where her features soften, his brow furrows at her comment. ]

I've shown you emotion. What else would you call our initial interaction?

I've just said that I see and relate to them...

[ She tilts her head, peering over her glasses at him - perhaps not to see him, but rather, to connect. ]

And yet, I've also seen that you lock it all away without notice. I imagine that was your attempt at normalcy-- [ Her gaze drifts away. ] -- but, of course, we've only just met. These are but suppositions.

[ He huffs slightly, realising he misinterpreted her words and made a bit of a fool of himself. ]

I would say that I regret ever opening myself up to another, but then I'm doing so again, here with you.

[ A sigh and his features seem to lose their rigidness. ]

[ Grell doesn't know how to take that. She assumes the last person had been his wife, and so she must wonder what his expectations of her are. Most of all, she can't figure out what she makes of him.

Her hearts, however, may have fluttered just so. ]

That must mean that it's time to tell me your story, then.

[ Just as Grell had done, William gives a glance around, making sure no one is paying them any mind. Normally he wouldn't think twice in directly stating something to someone, but there are certain circumstances in his story that would not do him well should the wrong people know. ]

My wife attempted to poison me, presumably for any inheritance she would collect upon my death. When I discovered this, I was both heartbroken and furious. [ He takes a breath. ] I hit her and she toppled over the stair railing. Essentially, I murdered her in an outburst of rage.

[ Grell's lips part, just short of gaping. ]

What a wretched woman...

[ Because that's precisely what one should pull from this. ]

[ Still, her reaction pulls his face into a confused frown. ]

Yet I cannot help but feel guilt for harming her and foolishness for falling in love.

[ He shifts his spectacles from his nose to rub across his eyes. ]

[ Looking down, she shifts in her seat to sit proper, so that she may lean in closer. She extends her hand out to lay over William's - though it hovers in hesitation. ]

From what I understand, you experienced a tragic outcome to an honest reaction, but it was an accident. She took advantage of, and intended to kill you, William.

[ Her hand curls in on itself, instead pressing to her lips. ]

While I cannot speak on what it is to be in love, I--... I know that it takes not foolishness, but a great deal of courage to instil that sort of trust in another.

[ William rights his frames just in time to see her hand pull away from his.
He follows it's motion, until his eyes make contact with hers. ]

I suppose she would have done so whether I opened myself up to her or not.

[ The tone of his voice hasn't swayed much, but there's a saddened undertone to it which Grell should have zero issue picking up on. ]

[ Blushing, her eyes dart away - although they return upon hearing the state of his voice. There's empathy in her gaze. ]

Your love isn't insignificant, if that's what you mean. It's certainly changed my life. [ There's a wry tinge to those last words - an attempt at a joke! ]

You don't seem to think it's for the better.

[ Apparently, William's not good at picking up on hints of jokes. ]

[ Pressing her parted lips, she's awkwardly sitting back into her chair. So, her inappropriate joke didn't land; this is probably why she doesn't have friends! ]

N--no... But, ah, as you've said to me, the future is indiscernible... [ She runs her hands together for warmth, to fidget. ] I can say that it's been interesting..

It certainly has.

[ Should he apologise? It's not like him to, but the guilt he's felt this past month seems to be making him do a lot of things he normally wouldn't have.

I suppose I shouldn't have interjected. You seem to have made your decision, whereas I am hung up on mine.

...Oh?

[ Stilling, she's back to folding her arms around her, while watching him somewhat wearily. ]

If I've decided that I want to go back, what would you do?

I...

[ He makes an irritated sound, regretting even stating as much. ]

Fine. Then I will have to keep my eyes on you.

[ It's difficult to tell if that's an indignant sniff that she gives, or an amused one! Either way, she looks away with a flutter of the lashes- and sees their food incoming.

Sitting herself upright with anticipation, she picks up her tea mug just as the woman sets it down before them. For a moment, she just wishes to relish the sensation of the heat in her hands, and inhale its aroma as its steam wafts over her face. ]

[ Attempting to ignore the response she had, William takes up his tea, as well. Rather than savouring it's warmth or scent, he moves right in to sipping it. It isn't the best tea, in fact, it's rather unpleasing compared to what he's used to, but he has to admit he's used to better quality of products than the people of this village. At least he has the respect to wait until the woman has left them be to let it show on his face. If this is their tea, he has little hope for the food she's brought. ]

[ When that is what Grell looks up to see, she has to press a hand over her mouth. There, she stifles the quietest little snicker, but the amusement still shows in her eyes. ]

You've the best ideas.

[ His eyes narrow at her as he places his cup off to the side. ]

I will remind you that you shared one of my ideas not too long ago.

Mm, did we, though?

[ After all, she can recall one of them changing their minds!

Finally taking a sip at her own tea, she immediately leans forward, letting it fall back into her cup with a choked back sputter. ]

[ If William was one to laugh, he would have done so just then. Instead, he shakes his head with a sigh. ]

Before I dragged you away, yes.

[ Pressing her fingertips to her wetted lips, she takes up her handkerchief from her pocket, to press over her mouth. Meanwhile. The tea is hastily set aside, by William's. ]

Which would lead me to believe you weren't sold on it. [ She finally mumbles, refolding the cloth. ]

[ Unable to win that argument, he focuses on the food before him. Toast shouldn't be horrid, nor the jam. But it's the meat he's more wary of. He avoids it for now, picking up a slice of toast, instead. ]

Is there anything that would have you change your mind?